Sime~Gen Roleplaying: Householding Naros Scenario
Episode #168: On the Rose Again (10/17/99)
Riyyh sighs in profound relief as he spots the inn, their destination for today, some miles away.
Nick has finally managed to reach a compromise with Rhonda's Rose: He can rack all he wants, as long as he keeps up, doesn't stop suddenly, and steers in the general direction indicated.
Nick is still trying to figure out exactly how one is supposed to sit a rack.
Nick suspects that the bruised sitting spots are not part of the intended consequences.
Rhonda's Rose is proud to be serving his master so well, although a little bit bewildered as to why his master is making it so hard on him.
Rhonda's Rose thinks that he might be doing something wrong himself, but has yet to figure out what that might be, despite carefully scrutinizing all of his glorious master's instructions.
Nick grunts as one bounce lands on a particularly sore spot.
Riyyh: There it is. [smiles, pointing at the inn nestled between fashionable rolling hills]
Riyyh: See?
Riyyh knows Nick's rear end will welcome an end to their day. He can zlin, after all.
Nick squints.
Riyyh himself will welcome it very much. Besides finding travel very stressful, and tending to get terribly stiff on rides of an hour much less a day of riding, he is really looking forward to a bath.
Nick: The place with the tile roof?
Riyyh: Yes. [beams] A delightful place. I stop here any time I pass on this road.
Nick looks at the inn thoughtfully.
Nick: It looks prosperous.
Riyyh's horse knows about the inn, having stopped at it on the way to Capitol, and begins to arch his neck and prance showily (as opposed to just skittishly), anticipating an audience sometime within the hour.
Riyyh's horse believes in being prepared.
Nick starts estimating the probability of finding sickness and/or injury in such a place, out of habit.
Nick notes the increased dancing by Riyyh's mount, and looks at his own a bit apprehensively.
Nick is already being bounced way too much for his taste.
Rhonda's Rose wonders if Vanity knows something he doesn't.
Vanity thinks he does, at least, and practices a particularly showy caracole.
Riyyh: It's the only very nice inn along these parts, so most of the official traffic out of Capitol uses it. We enjoy the benefits.
Nick: I see.
Nick wonders how Riyyh can just sit there and ignore his mount's antics.
Riyyh has become sadly familiar with Vanity's erratic behavior, and strokes the glossy neck absently.
Nick decides that it must be a Sime thing.
Vanity does a little sideways trot to show his appreciation.
Riyyh: There, there. [and to Nick] He knows where we're headed.
Riyyh: The stabling facilities there are excellent.
Nick: I'm sure.
Nick's notion of "adequate" stabling may not match Vanity's.
Riyyh: It really is a liability traveling with a quality animal, one must be so careful as to where one stays.
Vanity snorts and flags his tail, to show that he is worth it.
Riyyh actually needn't worry on that count, as he so fussy about where he'll stay while on the road that any stable facilities attached will surely be extra-special.
Nick: I'm sure it is.
Nick has never ridden a high enough quality animal that stabling was an issue.
Rhonda's Rose decides that he doesn't want to be left out of whatever it is.
Rhonda's Rose begins to get rather excited.
Nick: Hey!
Nick tries to secure his seat, inadvertently clutching with his legs.
Rhonda's Rose: Oh my! How exciting!
Rhonda's Rose leaps forward.
Rhonda's Rose: What is it? What is it? He wants me to hurry, it must be something really good.
Rhonda's Rose is the equine equivalent to a hyperactive puppy dog.
Vanity: It's a nice mash, with molasses!
Rhonda's Rose does have a very nice fast trot, especially when he kicks his legs out fore and aft.
Vanity jumps two feet up in his own excitement, then accelerates forward, somewhat hindered by the pack horses.
Nick: Oh, nooooo!
Nick clings to the mane.
Packhorse One: Talent! [snorts]
Packhorse One: ~~ disgust ~~
Vanity: Come on, come on! Don't be lazy!
Packhorse One picks up her feet.
Packhorse One: Coming! [in a very different tone of voice]
Packhorse One: [to other packhorse] All mane and tail and no brains.
Vanity: We must show our worth. That way, the stablehands will give us extra brushing, and a bit more grain.
Vanity dances in anticipation.
Packhorse One: Very well, we will look our best. [calls to Vanity, in a cheerful tone]
Vanity: Come on, then!
Packhorse One: [to other packhorse:] My ass! They'll give them extra brushing; we'll be in the scut stable.
Packhorse One works her legs faster.
Packhorse One: Shendoni, it's not as if I don't have an entire House on my back.
Vanity sets out after the trotting Rhonda's Rose in a flashy, collected canter, neck arched to show his mane to best advantage.
Packhorse One: He who carries the Sectuib is lighter of feet than she who carries the Sectuib's... urgh!!
Packhorse One makes a faster trot.
Packhorse One sighs.
Packhorse Two snorts consolingly.
Packhorse Two: I know. It's not at all fair for those brainless ninnies to get all the attention, when we do all the work, is it?
Packhorse One: Blood isn't everything. [sniffs] That's what my mother always used to say.
Packhorse One's mother was also a pedigreeless packhorse, of course.
Packhorse Two ducks a clod of dirt thrown up by Vanity's dancing hooves.
Packhorse Two: Still, it's nice to keep it inside of one.
Packhorse One: Still, I could be doing worse, I could have him on my back.
Packhorse One means Nick.
Packhorse One: He's all elbows!
Packhorse Two snorts in amusement.
Packhorse Two: You'd think he'd never been on a horse, before.
Packhorse One shares the common equine prejudice against Gen riders.
Packhorse Two: And that idiot Rhonda's Rose hasn't the least notion how to bring him along properly.
Packhorse Two: You can't start them out with the fancy moves before they've gotten the basics down.
Packhorse One likes Gens on the ground, where they don't dart around and scare her, and Simes on top, where they have natural balance and don't weigh much.
Packhorse One: He still thinks the lump knows what's going on, that's what his problem is.
Packhorse Two: Yes, and he'll have a tangled mane to show for it, at the very least.
Packhorse One: Just listen to him, "my glorious master this" and "my glorious master that".
Packhorse Two nods, or tries to; it's not always easy when being led by a halter at a brisk pace.
Packhorse Two: He's an idiot.
Packhorse Two: Now, I've trained a rider or two in my time, if I do say so, myself.
Packhorse Two: You have to start slow, till they learn how to balance properly.
Packhorse Two: Otherwise they bounce around making your back sore.
Packhorse One: He's only 6. [disparagingly]
Packhorse One: He just doesn't know any better.
Packhorse One: Young pups. We should be in charge.
Packhorse One: And in front. [adds]
Packhorse Two snorts the dust out of her nostrils in agreement.
Packhorse One displays the natural resentment of a mature mare in her prime being made to follow around young geldings.
Riyyh thinks they will be getting there a bit sooner than he'd expected.
Packhorse Two is also familiar with the road, and the inn, and tries to push past Vanity.
Packhorse Two: If they want a race, I'll show those youngsters what a mare of quality can do.
Riyyh tugs the packhorses back.
Riyyh: There there, we'll be there soon enough. You're after the grain, aren't you, poor dears?
Packhorse Two tosses her head in protest, but drops back.
Riyyh has indeed developed the odious habit of talking to horses while in Capitol.
Riyyh has never believed in such a thing, but went through a lonely period while looking for housing, before hitting upon the party plan.
Packhorse Two: Not that they'll give us a decent portion, with those two to gape at.
Packhorse One: Hmmph.
Packhorse One: When will they learn to think with their backs instead of their eyes?
Packhorse Two: Well, if they were sensible creatures, they'd use their own legs, so there you are.
Packhorse One: I'd like to see the well-named Vanity try to carry what I've got on right now. [grumbles]
Packhorse One: He'd be begging for mercy before a mile.
Packhorse Two: He'd be begging for mercy before he left the stableyard!
Packhorse One: That Rhonda's Rose is such a big gawky thing he could probably do the trick, but everything breakable would be in smithereens before a hundred yards.
Packhorse One: I have a smooth trot, I always have, they always say so.
Packhorse Two: Yes. No one understands the sort of care and precision required for this kind of work.
Packhorse Two: It's not like it was as easy as it looks.
Packhorse Two: Not if one has standards to maintain.
Packhorse One: It's certainly a lot more difficult than prancing about pretending one has less brains than a down feather.
Packhorse One pauses thoughtfully.
Packhorse One: Well, unless one does have less brains than a down feather. In which case they may find their work rather challenging.
Packhorse One has never thought of it that way before.
Packhorse One is always looking for new ways to make herself feel better about how the fancy half is treated.
Packhorse Two: Yes. They do seem to be concentrating hard, now that I think of it.
Packhorse Two: The poor things.
Packhorse Two is starting to feel rather maternal, just thinking about it.
Packhorse One: Well, I suppose we must give them some credit after all, then. At least they are trying their best, with what pathetic little they've been given to work with.
Packhorse One: God doesn't give true talent, brains, or dependability freely to all horses.
Packhorse Two: A friend of mine had a foal like that once: couldn't learn the first thing about how to get on.
Packhorse One listens sympathetically.
Packhorse Two: It got itself tangled in barbed wire, and shredded itself trying to get loose, instead of waiting sensibly for help.
Packhorse One: My heavens! How awful.
Packhorse Two: And well, with scars like that, it was never able to amount to much.
Packhorse One: Who was your owner before this?
Packhorse Two: I worked on a big estate, with many other horses. There were three stallions, and they all thought I was quite something, I assure you.
Packhorse Two: My owner appreciated me, too: He had me teach his children to ride.
Packhorse One is glad to be traveling in such company.
Packhorse Two: So I do know how it's done, and that Rhonda's Rose is not going about it properly.
Packhorse One: I am sure you are right!
Packhorse Two looks at the desperately clinging Nick thoughtfully.
Packhorse Two: Do you think he'd be willing to accept some pointers, from older and wiser heads?
Packhorse One: Maybe you should just make them saddle you up instead of that featherduster. Do you think the saddle would fit?
Packhorse Two measures it thoughtfully.
Packhorse One: Not that I would look forward to a day with him back here, mind you....
Packhorse One: Pity or no, there is only so much conversation you can have with a horse like that.
Packhorse Two: Well, it might be possible to wear that saddle, but you know how important riders think appearances are.
Packhorse Two: They might not go along with it.
Packhorse One: That one? ~~ incredulous ~~ Look at his blanket!
Packhorse One means Nick's cape.
Packhorse One: It's in tatters.
Packhorse Two: I know, but it's the other one that's in charge, you can tell.
Packhorse One: The older one. [with satisfaction]
Packhorse Two: And there's nothing tattered about him.
Packhorse One: Even if he is a gelding. [adds]
Packhorse Two: Well, yes. That does limit his worth a bit.
Packhorse Two tries a little prance of her own.
Packhorse One: Pshaw! I can do better than that.
Packhorse One: And you have lived on a fancy estate?
Packhorse Two: My dear, I do have my pack to consider.
Packhorse One: Watch this:
Packhorse One tucks her nose against her neck and attempts an outrageous prance.
Riyyh is forced to slow Vanity as the pack horses lag.
Packhorse Two matches her, step for step.
Riyyh looks back to see what they're doing, and has to laugh.
Packhorse Two: We'll show those youngsters a thing or two.
Riyyh: Oh, dear.
Nick realizes that he is getting too far ahead, and tries to delicately rein in Rhonda's Rose, without triggering the fast-halt option.
Riyyh watches.
Nick: Easy, there. We'll get there fast enough.
Riyyh has been trying to compile a list of pointers, although zlinning what a person is doing in the way of subtle muscle movements at the same time he himself is handling Vanity, two pack horses and their reins, is not exactly easy.
Nick is hoping that speaking in a calm and soothing tone of voice, without the fatal word "Whoa", will accomplish his purpose.
Nick unclenches one hand from the mane and tries a tentative neck-pat.
Rhonda's Rose assumes from the fact that his scalp isn't being twisted into a corkscrew anymore that his master no longer desires to get there as soon.
Rhonda's Rose appreciates a master's occasional desire to make a stately entrance to a place.
Rhonda's Rose slows down smoothly, although his legs retain the identical flashy movements they had when he was traveling quickly, an eerie illusion and one he's quite proud of. (After all, he worked hard enough to learn it.)
Nick blinks as the rapid forward movement of the flying trot is translated to up-and-down movement.
Nick: Doesn't this creature come with a regular walk?
Nick: ~~ plaintive ~~
Riyyh: Why yes, of course he does. [smiles kindly]
Riyyh: Or at least, he had one when I test rode him.
Nick: Well, he seems to have forgotten it.
Riyyh: I am sure the two of you will become quite accustomed to each other, and then all will be fine.
Riyyh is frankly amazed at how much energy the big horse still has; Vanity has been quite reasonable for hours now.
Vanity is saving energy for a truly spectacular entrance, now that he has competition.
Vanity is feeling a bit smug that at least his rider can stay aboard without looking like a pack.
Riyyh is glad; as impressive as a flashy horse is, people do tend to get exasperated if one's creature is ostentatiously unmanageable and requires 3 helpers to allow a dismount.
Rhonda's Rose: Are we there yet? Are we there yet?
Rhonda's Rose: How do I look?
Rhonda's Rose: Oh, I feel good. I love exercise. What a wonderful day!
Vanity takes a few sideways steps, just to warm up.
Rhonda's Rose: Does my master look good? He feels off balance. I hope he doesn't fall off. I would be mortified.
Vanity: The stable is just around the curve in the road there.
Vanity looks at Nick in concern.
Rhonda's Rose: Ooh! Oh! A stable! A stable with molasses mash! I can't wait! It sounds so good.
Vanity: He does look a bit awkward, but then, he's new, isn't he?
Rhonda's Rose works up a new lather just thinking about it.
Rhonda's Rose: New? My master is new??!
Rhonda's Rose: Oh yes, new to me he is.
Rhonda's Rose nods, bobbing his head showily.
Rhonda's Rose: I just got him today.
Vanity: Perhaps he hasn't had a chance to ride a real, quality horse before?
Vanity: It does take them some time to learn, but when they do, you can really look spectacular.
Rhonda's Rose: Do you think so? Oh, what a great honor to be the best a great master of this caliber has ever tried!
Vanity turns sideways while trotting, to demonstrate Riyyh's stability.
Vanity ends with a little hop.
Rhonda's Rose: I shall do my best to do everything exactly as he bids me, so that he shall find no fault with anything whatsoever that I might do, and to make his life easy and graceful with my obedience and alertness. [promises himself]
Rhonda's Rose sneaks a look at Vanity.
Rhonda's Rose: It is true, your master does sit well.
Rhonda's Rose: But he is not new for you, is he?
Vanity: You see? I'm sure yours will learn.
Vanity: I've had mine for years, you know.
Vanity: We're used to each other.
Rhonda's Rose wouldn't dream of considering the Sime/Gen question; after all, any master of his is by definition brilliant and wise, regardless of larity.
Vanity slows down a hair and struts, showing off his silvery mane and tail to great advantage.
Riyyh smiles, recognizing genuine showing-off-for audience when he sees it.
Riyyh: We're here, Nick.
Nick: ~~ relief ~~
Nick is starting to feel homesick for Pumpkin, lazy as he was.
Nick secures his hold and tries a "Whoa!" as they reach the inn's courtyard.
Rhonda's Rose remembers that the new command, "Whoa!" means to stop very suddenly, and promptly does so with a precision that would do a cow horse proud.
Rhonda's Rose learned in training that it is always very important to do things exactly as you were taught, and thinks he has identified exactly how Nick likes it done.
Nick is better prepared this time, and manages to stay pretty much in the saddle.
Riyyh: Oh, dear. [to himself]
Nick takes advantage of the halt in bouncing to make a quick, semi-dignified dismount.
Vanity is, of course, prancing and dancing around in circles, to show his moves to the stable hands.
Riyyh manages to hand off the packhorses' reins to a stable hand, and then concentrates on trying to get Vanity to stop long enough for him to get off.
Riyyh: There, there. You're quite special, I'm sure you know that, but I would like to get off now.
Riyyh: Oh, dear.
Riyyh might have just jumped off during his younger years, but would prefer not to now, knowing that he'll be as stiff as a board.
Vanity bounces particularly high, then stops and poses, in a strategic spot where the mares can best admire him.
Riyyh dismounts and pats his shoulder.
Riyyh gives a sheepish grin to the stable boy who comes to take the reins.
Riyyh: He's really no trouble at all. [explains]
Riyyh is actually aware that the supposedly refined Vanity is prone to knocking people down in his haste to get to the food, but doesn't want to alarm anybody.
Vanity snorts and dances just a bit to show his quality, careful not to jerk on the reins.
Vanity would hate to miss being lead directing to the nearest comfortable-stall-with-molasses-mash, after all.
Riyyh hands the reins over.
Riyyh glances at Nick, assessing his condition.
Nick is walking a bit stiffly as he approaches Riyyh.
Riyyh smiles at him.
Nick: I haven't been riding enough, lately.
Nick: ~~ sheepish ~~
Riyyh is feeling extremely stiff himself; it has less to do with riding per se than with age, a thought which he is having more and more trouble avoiding as he does more and more riding and nothing improves.
Riyyh smiles at Nick.
Riyyh: You did fine.
Nick: I stayed on, at least.
Nick feels that that is something of an accomplishment, under the circumstances.
Riyyh: Perhaps you and I could work with Rose a little bit tomorrow morning, before we leave.
Riyyh can't imagine anything he'd rather do less, but he knows Nick would not want another ride as uncomfortable as today's.
Riyyh would rather not zlin him having it either.
Nick looks pathetically grateful.
Nick: I would like that.